“Go after the men that are going after you,” she said.
My big sister texted me the other day letting me know that she’d been reading my blogs and wanted to share a word the Lord laid upon her heart. I appreciated the advice she was willing to share and the simple fact that she was reading my blogs. But in all honesty, my initial reaction was “here we go again.” I struggle from time to time when people tell me, “the Lord said.” It doesn't matter who it is. As a single woman, I recieve advice about dating on a weekly if not daily basis. Sometimes from the most random people. It’s almost as if I have a sign on my back that reads: “SINGLE: Please help!” The advice comes like the bible describes blessings, “you just don't have room enough to receive them! Now don't get me wrong, many of them are blessings, but other times they can just be too much and I have a hard time taking them in!
So God had to check me like only he can! Hi! My name is Kristin and I do suffer from a terrible disease called pride! Yes! I can admit and say that five letter word out loud! I have a tendency to think I know it all and struggle to receive advice from others at times. It’s also hard to receive when you are so use to pouring out to others. You trick yourself into thinking that you don’t need the help or advice from others. There! I said it! The first step is acknowledgement! The truth is, I've always known this about myself. Its definitely a struggle I bring before the Lord on a daily,hourly, and even a minute by minute basis. The bible says pride comes before a fall, and in this season, I want to fall in love, not on my face in shame!
My sister is older, a minister, a physical therapist, and she is married! I look up to her and admire her and she always comes in a humble spirit! She desires the best for me and I love her! I mean, she is in a place that I desire to be, married! Why not heed to her advice!? Who am I?! A single woman desiring to be married! So I asked God to humble my spirit and show me how I was to apply her advice. In all honesty my immediate thought was that I was not to “go after” any man. I’m suppose to be found, right? Me being a bit literal and again, prideful! Then I began to run down some of the men that have come after me. If she only knew! Many of them I wouldn't even walk behind let alone run after! So what were you saying again Lord?
That Monday, a gentleman I use to “talk” to texted me randomly and invited me to dinner! You may recall, he was “Mr.Too Much Too Soon.” Talking about courtship before I even knew his last name. Him! I hadn’t spoken to him in over a month and I was a bit taken back by his text. No small talk, but straight to the point. I was hesitant about the request and waited until the next day to give him an answer. And her text message came up on a Tuesday! LOL
I’m all about second chances and if I applied her text message correctly, he was going after me, again! So after much debate and a talk with my mother who confessed that she was afraid she would never have any grandchildren, I obliged and we went to dinner. It was nice, but again I realized that I wasn’t interested. There wasn’t a connection and I simply was not attracted to him, but we could definitely be friends. At least that’s what I decided in my head, for the second time. He proceeded to text me everyday after our dinner, and I tried to engage, but something in me just said let it go.
Now I get the whole “going after you” piece, but if you’re not interested, you’re just not interested. I’ve slowly but surely let go of my list but chemistry still goes a long way. So even with his checklist being quite impressive, I’ve always gone with the fact that every great guy isn't for me, but that one great guy will be!
So back to God and this text message. As I re-read her message I also found where she said, “their main concern, priority, and desire should be you!?” And I absolutely agree! I want a man that wants me, prioritizes me at the top of his list, and desires to be with me and only me.
Through this experience I received her advice and attempted to apply it. And what God continues to reveal to me is that with every word others may give, DISCERNMENT is absolutely key! Advice divided, multiplied and added with discernment equals wisdom. And wisdom applied to the proper place, time, and person equals divine purpose.
She shared that her first lady gave her that advice years before she met her husband, and I truly believe she applied it at the right time. Her husband absolutely adores her and chased after her relentlessly. And the kicker, he wasn't even her type!
God always places people in your path who have been there and done that! It’s simply up to you to receive and apply it appropriately.